Random Quote Mondays

Yanno, cartoons rock, honestly. They can be so revealing of our society and governmental processes and stuff...

Commander, do something violent!

Yes!!!! Finally, the truth about how 'acts of aggression' really work comes to light!!! *giggles*

Words of Wisdom...

I could really use some good news, like a cookie that says 'play these lucky numbers, guaranteed to win!' or something:

The only thing we know for sure about future developments is that they will develop.

*rolls eyes* Well that's not exactly very helpful. *grumbles* Not playing the lucky numbers from this cookie, I can tell ya that. *harumphs* :P

Random Quote Mondays

And now for something a little foreign:

Kheperu (my dramatic fluffy fatkitten):

MOW!!! Moooooooowohowowoooooh. MewowooooohmowMEEEWoooooohmow?! Meeeeeeeew?

Translation (for Humans who *ahem* have not had the common sense to take a course in Housecat):

FEED ME!!! I am in my designated feeding area and yet food has not appeared. Don't you know I'm DYING this very second from your slow, inept feeding procedures?! Moooom?



What? I never said the quotes would make sense or have meaning. *scoffs, rolls eyes, chuckles*

Not so tasty treats...

Here's an "interesting" story about campus life and the importance of education.

In a biology class, the instructor was discussing the high glucose levels found in semen. A female freshman raised her hand and asked "if I understand, you're saying there's a lot of glucose, as in sugar, in semen?"

"That's correct," responded the professor, going on to add statistical information.

Raising her hand again the girl asked, "then why doesn't it taste sweet?"

After a stunned silence the whole class burst into laughter. The poor girls face turned bright red as she realized exactly what she had inadvertently said (or rather, implied). She picked up her books without a word and walked out of the class, never to return. However, as she was going out the door, the instructors reply was classic. Totally straight-faced he answered her question, "it doesn't taste sweet because the taste buds for sweetness are on the tip of your tongue, not at the back of your throat."

Words of Wisdom...

My brother and I have been working out more and stuff, ostensibly to be healthier, but I think it's more because he wants to look sexy in a suit again or something and he's just viciously dragging me along for the ride (it's boring to exercise alone or something).

A man who trims himself to suit everybody will soon whittle himself away.

*blinks* !! I should maybe tell him the cookies say he should worry more about himself than what others think?

Random Quote Mondays

Who you gonna call?:

Just call Daffy Duck, Bugs Bunny and Porky Pig, paranormalists at large. Spooks spooked, goblins gobbled, UFOs K.O.ed, aliens alienated, vampires evaporated, and monsters remonstrated.

Seriously, cuz the Ghostbusters never offered to remonstrate any monsters, evaporate any vampires or alienate any aliens. *nods solemnly*

Physics Test From Hell

Note: The Physics Test From Hell joke has been circulating for over a decade. In that time it has been tweaked, adjusted and even changed completely several times. To the best of my knowledge (based largely in part on the fact that this is the joke as I received it in 1997) this is the "original" version. No, I do not know if it really is a "true story". Enjoy it anyway. :P



True story: A thermodynamics professor had written a take home exam for his graduate students. It had one question: "Is hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with a proof." Most students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:


First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for souls entering hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant.
#1 So, if hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose.
#2 Of course, if hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will drop until hell freezes over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Therese Banyan during Freshman year that "it will be a cold night in hell before I sleep with you" and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then #2 cannot be true, and hell is exothermic.


The student got the only "A".